“Is that it?” This was the question written on my kids’ faces after we had opened all of the presents this Christmas. Actually, this is the question that most of us ask (or want to ask) after the holidays, a big celebration, or a nice vacation. We look around and think, “That was fun, but it didn’t really satisfy.” Watch my #FamilyFriday video to see how our disappointment can lead us to contentment.
Our experience of disappointment after the holidays or some other experience can be a powerful tool for reflection and teach us some important lessons about the place of things, people, and experiences in our lives. Here is a brief outline of thoughts that I talked through on the video above.
Things are temporary.
Paul says that we have brought nothing into this world and we cannot take anything out of it either (1 Tim. 6:7). Things are temporary, and because they are temporary they are limited in their ability to fulfill our greatest needs. Our souls, created in God's image, know down deep that temporary things cannot meet eternal needs.
Things cannot ultimately satisfy.
This is why we are always in the search for more. More food. More money. More sex. A better house. A nicer car. A better job. And the list goes on and one. Their failure to satisfy doesn't keep us from pursuing them like mad. Often it locks us into this lie that if we only had more it would be enough. The problem of greed is that it is monster that will never be full no matter how it is glutted.
Our disappointment highlights areas where idols may exist in our hearts.
Martin Luther says, “Whatever your heart clings to and confides in, that is really your God, your functional savior.” So it may be that we end up disappointed because we were putting our hopes in that person, thing or expectation. I want to be careful here because I don’t want to say something that will lead to confusion. Let me be clear. Just because we feel the sting of unmet or unfulfilled expectations at times doesn’t necessarily mean that we have huge idols hanging around in our heart. I’m simply trying to say that in as far as my joy and happiness are connected to a thing in this life, that is the level of control that thing has over my heart. And if it has control over my heart it has the potential to be an idol in my life. If I discover that I have created an idol out of what is otherwise a very good thing, I need to identify and root these out. Good things make great gifts but poor gods.
The secret to contentment is more trust not more stuff.
The secret to contentment is not in having more stuff but in having more trust that God is who He says He is and will do what He says He will do. In this way, whether you much or have little, you will always have what is necessary. In fact, even if we should go without something that is otherwise needful for this life, we can still be content knowing that life is more than food and clothing. Life is Jesus Christ who has already conquered the grave and will lavish His riches upon us for all eternity in His presence.
What can we do to build content out of disappointment? Here are some thoughts.
Use a gift to celebrate the Giver.
The greatest aspect of a gift is not that thing itself but that someone put in thought and love to give it to us. this is why your mom probably said something like, "It's the thought that counts." That's cliche but it actually quite true. Of course, we want to make good gifts with good intentions, but the person behind the gift is really the greater blessing. Celebrating the giver puts things in their rightful place. We can enjoy the gift but not become so focused on it that we forget who gave it. This is especially true of the good gifts that God gives. Our health, money, jobs, house, cars, families, and many other things are simply tastes of God’s grace. They show us His love and care, but they are never supposed to be what we set our heart upon. They are tastes of goodness but not the substance of goodness. God is the ultimate good, so to have Him is to have everything. This is why Jesus can instruct us in Matthew to "seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” (Matt. 6:33)
Cultivate gratitude.
We must learn to be thankful for the gifts given even if it’s not all the gifts wanted. We look to what we have instead of what we don’t have.
Give cheerfully and generously.
Giving loosens our grip on stuff and loosens its grip on us. Remember, we have nothing that we have not first received. So, let us share of the riches of our God with liberality.
